1. Take back control
Don’t think that just because we are in a pandemic that the threat of warfare is too far away. (Remember a few months ago when it looked like the United States and Iran were on the verge of a full-fledged conflict? Boy, those were simpler times!) Practice your Cold-War-Era Duck-and-Cover technique with your classic oak, tri-paneled dining room table. Simply crawl under the table, tuck your knees to your chest, and pray to the God you may or may not believe in!
Whether you’re using it as a Zoom fashion accessory, or just pretending to be that drunk person at a party for digital happy hour, the Constantinople Canvas makes the perfect hat.